Disclaimer: If you somehow were interested in reading this column without realizing it would contain spoilers for both Agents Of Shield and Captain America: The Winter Soldier…then you were wrong, and kind of weirdly dumb for even thinking that.
Marvel’s
Agents Of Shield has not been a good show. In its
first 15 weeks of life, it has featured flat, unengaging characters
engaging in rote, unimpressive action sequences and exchanging in
sporadically amusing banter across the same cheap set. “Crossover”
episodes that were less eventful than the standard procedural episodes.
Production values that make you wonder if ABC and Disney even knew
these kids were making a show from their IP.
But how much of this was really the show’s “fault”? A great deal of
it, undoubtedly. But as a serialized narrative, it was lethally middled
from the moment of its conception. So how much of
AoS’s failure
should be attributed to Nature (being inherently torn between the need
to stand on its own and simultaneously serve the greater needs of the
MCU), and how much to Nurture (failings in writing, casting, and general
execution)?
NATURE:
AoS is unprecedented in certain ways. It exists primarily to
prop up and promote the Marvel film franchises, so one might have
expected more extensive crossovers and guest appearances from the
Avengers. But so far, we have had one scene with Nick Fury, and one
episode where one of Thor’s Lil’ Buddies came through town. That’s not
really exploiting the enormous, colorful Marvel Universe to its fullest
potential, a need which would seem to be built into the show’s DNA.
But it’s also as it should be, probably. This is a 22 episode season
of a weekly drama series. It can’t be nothing but cockteases for
The Winter Soldier and
Age Of Ultron and
Starfox: The Worst Avenger.
And thus you have the major instability at heart of the show. We have
to buy into these characters and be interested in their adventures in
and of themselves, but we are really only supposed to care because of
their proximity to the real deal Heroes and Shit That Actually Matters
(the movies). Separate them too much from the big events and you have
people tune out because they aren’t getting the MCU action they signed
up for; tie them too closely to the Big Stuff and the same people will
get antsy wondering why we’re wasting our time with the JV squad when
all the cool shit is happening just to the left of frame.
So what the show needs is to carve out its own identity, independent
from the movies it spun off from, so we can invest in the story we’re
actually watching rather than the more interesting one it suggests is
happening elsewhere. But then how is it that this week’s episode was by
far the most intimately tied to a Marvel movie, and also by far the
best episode to date?
NURTURE:
Because it fixed a lot of the problems with the execution. The
action was still largely confined to the plane and dark corridors, but
it is rougher, bloodier and has a desperate edge that fits with the dire
circumstances the team finds themselves in compared to earlier romps.
And the dogfighting sequences are a bit of a change of pace and features
decent effects work to boot. It’s not on the level of
Winter Soldier*, but it’s a real step up and pretty good by TV standards.
But more than that it’s that things actually HAPPENED. That the
major events were rolling downhill from the movies doesn’t matter much,
because the team needed a shakeup in a bad, bad way. Worse than they
needed better fight choreography, even; for all the improved action and
wild twists, my favorite bit in the episode was Fitz responding to the
threat of torture and enslavement by swearing to bring Paxton down.
Except that he’s not Iron Man, so he actually just promises to play a
part in taking him down. And he’s not Captain America, so he forces it
out through tears.
FitzSimmons are the best characters on
AoS, because they are
the only team members that actually are the “normal folk”, on a show
that is ostensibly premised around exploring normal folk within this
very abnormal world. Skye is some sort of alien from the planet
Sexytron, and it’s been all too easy to see Coulson/May/Ward as ersatz
analogues for Captain America/Black Widow/Hawkeye. We’ve talked a lot
on the message boards about how these folks are bland individuals, but
it’s also a problem that their team dynamic is basically what you would
get if you removed the really heavy hitters from the Avengers, then made
the less powerful folks even weaker and less distinctive. It creates a
feeling that we’re wasting time passing it with the watered-down
versions, which creeps into each and every scene in the show without our
really realizing it.
But as mentioned before this episode was definitely the high point of
the series. The final twist turns the weak characterization of Ward on
its head and allows for a shake-up of the team dynamic. But it’s about
the fourth twist of the episode, which pits the team against each other
before plunging them into a legitimately tense situation, where neither
they nor we know who they can trust. They can’t pack this many twists
into every episode, or else they would rapidly become weightless and
numbing. And they can’t drastically reboot the show every time they
need a goosing, no matter how much it spices things up that the team is
fractured and cut off from the unlimited resources, infrastructure and
reinforcements that SHIELD represented (a safety net that constantly
worked to erode any sense of danger or urgency an episode threatened to
build).
Now, though, things have the potential to be much more interesting
going forward. Don’t get me wrong, one good episode does not make
AoS
a good show. 15 hours is a long time to spend building a boring,
lukewarm house just so you can have fun burning it down in the 16
th,
and I’m neither in a hurry to revisit the earlier parts of the season
myself nor to blame anyone who bailed along the way. But there is
opportunity here, so as a public service I am going to offer my advice
for how to keep
Agents Of Shield operating at a level we might
call “good” with a straight face. I do this knowing that the remainder
of the season has no doubt been written if not shot already, but Jed
Whedon and Maurissa Tancharoen would have to be
crazy not to
reopen production to implement these suggestions. For clearly I possess
expertise they cannot hope to match. They are but experienced,
professional, HUGO Award-winning writers and showrunners, whereas I…
I have the internet.
So in helpful DO/DON’T format, here is how to save
Agents Of Shield:
DO: Move FitzSimmons further to the fore. As mentioned,
they’re the only completely human characters, and as such offer a
perspective that is unique to this show’s setting. I’m agnostic on
positioning them as a romantic pairing (because on the one hand that
seems really hacky and obvious, but on the other they’re
so cute together…), but give them emotional storylines to anchor and I don’t think they will let you down.
DON’T: Hire more models for new roles. I know Clark Gregg
looks like a normal dad, but having everyone else on the team, down to
the tech geeks, look runway-ready glamorous has not been working
terribly well. Agents Blake and Garrett immediately outshone the
superhumanly-symmetrical Skye and Ward from the moment they stepped on
screen, because they were played by honest-to-god
Actors, with
immediate, distinctive personalities. I realize that the most likely
additions to the team are Cobie Smulders (now that HIMYM is done) and
the replacement-Ward that showed up with Paxton, neither of whom are too
rough on the ol’ eyebones, but I’m just saying. The sets and costumes
are already homogenizing enough, so in the future cast with an eye for
diversity (be it of race, age, or rating on the
Clydesdale Scale).
DO: Give the team their own ongoing antagonist. Yes, they’ve
had the Clairvoyant, but it would seem that he turned out to be Paxton,
who is definitely not going to stick around on a weekly basis. Even if
the Clairvoyant is a mantle that gets passed around HYDRA according to
convenience, it’s no longer really viable now that we’ve seen behind the
curtain. Bring someone from the comics, but not a heavy hitter or
anything. It can be someone who has already been used in a minor
capacity in the films, like Armin Zola or Justin Hammer (Sam Rockwell is
arguably as big a star as Paxton, but he seems more like he’s game for
just about anything, so who knows?), or someone that is unlikely to ever
see the silver screen (Motherfucking MODOK!!!). Marvel’s got several
thousand characters to their names; don’t be afraid to burn a few just
because you might want to maybe use them in
Doctor Strange 3 in
2022. Of course, “Turn, Turn, Turn” set up Ward as the perfect person to
take on recurring villain duties. Which leads me to the most important
Don’t…
DON’T:
DO NOT PULL THE PUNCH WITH WARD’S TURN.
Don’t have it turn out that he was brainwashed or coerced into killing
his fellow agents. You can’t play that card again so soon after the
Deathlok arc. Don’t have it turn out that Hand planned to sacrifice
herself all along so that Ward could infiltrate Hydra and take it down
from the inside. That’s too risky and dumb for ostensibly smart
characters to think of as a viable plan, particularly when she is about
the highest-ranking loyalist left in the ranks.
Really don’t
have it turn out that the gun was loaded with blanks and the agents had
ketchup packet squibs ready as an elaborate fake out. If we can’t trust
that people are dead when you show them get shot point blank, followed
by a double-tap once they’re down, why should we even bother paying
attention to anything you ever show us again? And don’t have it be a
Life Model Decoy. Actually…
DON’T: Do anything with Life Model Decoys, ever. I mean fucking
ever.
They are dramatic antimatter. Once you introduce that device, you will
never be able to create a smidge of tension again (and this is a show
that runs on life-and-death stakes), and there is no putting the genie
back in the bottle. Again, if we can’t trust that a graphically
depicted point-blank firearm execution will result in death, then we
can’t trust anything and nothing matters at all. It’s bad enough that
Coulson was brought back to life and Fury elaborately faked his death in
Winter Soldier. I know coming back from the dead is a
longstanding comic book trope, but it’s probably the shittiest thing
about comics and it’s, if anything, even shittier here.
DO: Keep the action choreographer from last episode. The
fights were much better than they had been before, if not movie-level.
The show benefits from playing a little rougher. To that end…
DON’T: Keep futzing with the icers. I know the show’s for
kids (sorta) but kids don’t give a shit about the good guys shooting bad
guys. They don’t care that
Star Wars doesn’t stop in its tracks
to establish that Leia’s always sets her blaster to stun before taking a
shot at a stormtrooper. They would not have tuned out on
GI Joe
if the heroes occasionally hit their target. Kids can play with Nerf
guns themselves, they want to watch the grown-ups use the real things.
DON’T: Force a fistfight and a shootout into every episode. I
know I just made a big deal about the action, but elaborate action
sequences are simply not within the means of a weekly show like this.
Besides, I was talking mainly about stakes, not quotas for violence. A
better idea is to…
DO: Play up the sci-fi and espionage angles of the premise.
Aim for more suspense than action. The most effective part of “Turn,
Turn, Turn” was the
The Thing vibe that came from the crew
creeping around a base under siege, never sure who was actually the
enemy. There was a long infiltration scene on
The Americans this
week that eschewed any depiction of violence whatsoever, but was as
intense as any gunfight I’ve seen this year. That sort of thing falls
well within
AoS’s wheelhouse and budgetary limits, but for some
reason past episodes apparently felt like such sequences weren’t
complete until several armed guards ran at Ward and tried punching him
instead of shooting or tazing or macing him.
DON’T: Do another 22 episode season. 13 is fine, really. It
works for all the best shows, and a lot of them still end up with some
filler in there. 13 hours is a long time.
DO: Keep HYDRA in the driver’s seat for a while. I know that
the title of the show kind of indicates that the team can’t operate
independently forever, but the heroes work better as underdogs. And
again, operating without that safety net raises the stakes.
So that’s my plan for saving
Marvel’s Agents Of Shield. I
have another, more drastic one for if no renewal is coming and you want
to burn the whole thing down, but I assume that’s not going to be the
case.
AoS is never going to become the crown jewel of the MCU,
but I think moving in these directions would give the show a decent
chance at nabbing the elusive brass ring of Not Sucking.
YOU’RE WELCOME, Marvel/Disney/America.
*which features the best superhero action since
The Avengers, or
Spiderman 2
before it – I particularly like how so many of the combatants are not
shy about bringing guns to a fistfight, in sharp contrast to the
unfailingly polite guards and goons on
AoS.